Salmon Satirists Gifts

Farmed Salmon Restaurant - Everyone squashed together.

Civilized Salmon

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

Edna, I fear our love doesn't have a future... My parents would eat you!

'Are these mushrooms or toadstools? And why are you holding a stomach pump?.'

"I just spoon-fed the media a pound of really old salmon."

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

Fish Farm.

The real reason salad aids weight loss

"I know there's safety in numbers, but I suffer from enochlophobia: Can you help me?"

Seaside Aquarium

"This time lick my entire body."

'For obvious reasons the chowder's made with chicken and pork.'

'Great idea, Pete!'

'After paying for the boat, it's insurance, the docking and gas, I couldn't afford a trailer.'

"Don't worry, I quite enjoy a fishy breath: Now, open wide..."

'Trying to sell these things is like flogging a dead horse.'

'And the winner for best supporting animal in a frozen ready meal goes to...'

"May I be candid, Hogarth? I should have thought a shrimp girl would make a more appropriate subject than a girl shrimp."

Cocaine discovered in British marine life. . . Shrimp Coketail

"Simply put, our 'Nostalgia Special' is the 'Catch' of yesterday."

"Today the secret ingredients for Mom's Apple Pie were sold to the Japanese for sixty-eight million dollars."

'Things have been pretty quiet around here since the capt'n got into online piracy.'

"They're veggie hot dogs but don't worry—they're made in a really gross way."

'And when you taught my client to fish, instead of giving him one, did you ever stop to consider that he might be allergic to seafood!'

'No swordfish were harmed in the catching of our tuna, and no tuna were harmed in the catching of our swordfish.'

A Cow Funeral.

'Quadruple by-product.'

Afloat, only 20% of iceberg lettuce is visible.

"Let me tell you something about eating strange fish."

'Faux-horse beef for me, faux-beef horse for the wife.'

Finding the Venus in the Clams.

'Ill have the salad. But could I have it made out of chocolate?'