Salinger Fan Gifts

JD Salinger.

Billy. The Kid.

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

'That was Charlie Parker's 'Ornithology.' I threw in a flat nine in bar 16 and a tritone substitution in bar 22. Who noticed that? Hands up if you noticed!'

Tenors

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

The Horror Film Director.

A singer being criticised

"Love the tie, Chad—that is so pimp!"

Vote Grinkley! Now you see him, now you don't.

Pirate King

"This next one is about the healthy and drama-free relationship that very nearly ruined me as a songwriter before I realized what was happening and got the hell out of there."

Man playing large saxophone in shape of the word 'jazz'.

Freedom's just another word for doing what you're told?/Fascists make lousy folksingers.

"You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to meet you."

J.D.Salinger epitaph.

The Wright Bruhs take their maiden flight.

Musician

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

Your English teacher says you use too many Americanisms.

'Uh-oh, here comes the mike again. Cut the barbershop quartet and go back to mournful whistling.'

"Though you be a villainous scoundrel, fairness demands I inform you that's your cell."

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

'Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream. All together now!'

Why some people shouldn't try keeping up with slang. So, twerking hard or hardly twerking?

Mockingbird visits old mcdonald's farm: E-I-E-I-O!

"No, Simpkins, I don't think 'For When You Go Jump In The Lake' is a suitable slogan."

"Slogan."

"This town isn't big enough for the two of us."