Safety Supervisor Gifts

"Having trouble with that paper shredder again, Barry?"

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

Cricket roller accident.

"Thank goodness, it was only 'light' reading..."

Here we don't really want you to become a mover and shaker.

Soft play area. Kids leave nursing bruises, cuts and limping.

'Face it, you're mechanically impaired.'

'Teacher, I've got an eye in my sand.'

'I'm beginning to wish we hadn't sent you on the first aid course.'

"Ooops....I guess this one failed."

"The instructions said to lash a ladder."

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

Dangerous Construction Sites

"I'm here to assess the camp fire safety."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Others will fight for you

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

'I hate leaving work when I feel I could have delegated more.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

Boss's Desk Says No!

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

Pool attached to child's bed.

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."