Safe Word Enthusiast Gifts

"The Safety Word is 'Owwwwwwwwwww!'"

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"This report is mumbo jumbo...I asked for gobbledeeegook!"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

'And from what we've been able to determine, this is the tweak that broke the paradigm's back.'

"This is what we call a 'customer', or more accurately a 'potential profit centre.'"

"My resume is concise, succinct and eloquently worded. I only hope they know what I'm talking about."

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

'Instead of cubicles, we call them interconnected productivity centres.'

"I propose the next person who says 'it is what it is,' we beat the living hell out of him."

"Why do people think using big words is a bad thing?"

"I liked it better when you used gobbledygook."

"I hear you've got quite a reputation with the girls around the office."

"Come to my office. I need to cascade with you offline."

"Mr. Thomaston's people are here to talk to your people."

'If we are to reorientate our forward facing rhetorical platform we must rephrase our message to cross fertilise the core message..holistically!'

"Look at this - we're trying to merge with some of our acquisitions, and we're trying to acquire some of our mergers."

"Can you go through all the old pitch decks and replace the word 'crypto' with 'AI'?"

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

'But it didn't cost anything, dear! I did it all off balance-sheet!'

"O.K. What part of 'malignant regression and pathogenic reintrojection as a defense against psychic decompensation' don't you understand?"

'It has everything... I love it!'

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

'I'm afraid it's gingivitis.'

'I got my foot in the door...at a price!'

They had no idea what they were doing, but it didn't matter...

"Wait ... I always thought taking each other for granted was a good thing!"

"Our brand is about talking about our brand."

"Excellent report! Totally incomprehensible and confusing! Not one of our board members will understand a word! Absolutely perfect!"

Dan tells me you're an architect. That is so cool! Thanks! Cloud architect, actually.