Word Enthusiasts Gifts

'I understand that he was a teacher of English before he got this position.'

Now that we've invented language, we have to be careful not to get quoted out of context.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Lesser known greek gods,

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

The Pink Bantha

"He just said his first word!"

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

"Dad, can we have a bedtime narrative?"

'A Caesarian? - But I want my son to be a natural-born citizen!'

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

Tequila Mockingbird

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

"I found out why we study vocabulary. Last night, my mother told me to ruminate, and I spent three hours in my room."

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

Shell Fire

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

Biro Diversity

Frank & Ernest. Signe Painted. Cosmetology Dept. That should be "cosmology"! Why do you always get those two confused? I always think the one about space should have an "et" in it.

Apricots

"After searching for the sun all night, it finally dawned on me..."

"Why do people think using big words is a bad thing?"

Dyslexic Cattle Ranch

Loopholes

"All other letters have been disallowed."

'Are we watching business news or sports news?'

"I'm so glad you decided to participate in our Money for Employment program."

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

Charlie Beck Loves Austin Beutner

We pay the maximum minimum wage.

'So who's smoking?'

"Dad, is there a word that contains all the vowels?"

"Don't forget to call it a 'procedure'—it makes it less scary."