Rustic Lifestyle Gifts

Redneck Jacuzzi

"Ironically, this is the living room."

A Good Batch.

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

Country farmhouse loaf / Inner city highrise loaf.

"The new house is almost ready!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

"Ernie's full service salon and day spa."

"Life is beautiful, and it's messy."

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

Country life

The Rudges' peaceful home

"And how do expect to pay for this, Mr Morton?"

Rustic Camping: No Water, Electric or Wi-Fi

'The paper screwed up the ad. It read 'Wanted: Hired Gun' rather than 'hired man'.'

'You seem to be suffering from frontier mentality...'

'Jenkins, when was the last time you cleaned out the barn?'

Early American Think Tank.

'We like to welcome new team members with three cheers and a wet towel.'

'Did you remember to lock the house?'

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

Grandparents with their grandchild

Demand for reclaimed barn wood causes wave of new barn construction.

'Oh, how utterly romantic! A hunter rug in front of the fireplace!'

Related

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

'When they said, a vacation without frills, I didn't dream, this frilless!'

'Do you have to make that slurping sound when you eat?!'