Rural Romantics Gifts

Cow selling milk from small roadside stand.

'Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calf's stepfather?'

Rural Life - '... and to think that today it is St. Medardus Day! ...'

'A menage a trois That's sick'

My parents had a mutual love of grass.

'And just why would we need caller I.D.?'

Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!

'Inner-city kids in search of a butter life.'

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"I always knew you'd come back."

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

A boy who loves cows/burgers

'...doomed...from here...to eter...nity...'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

The Remote Olympics

Life is simpler in the sticks.

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

The pen is mightier than the sward.

'I love you guys!'

Shepherd

Maternity ward on the farm.

"Ugh, I need to hide - he has a strict policy about workplace dating."

I tried insuring my house over the phone but they insisted on seeing it. It was on fire at the time...

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

The cattle grid, the bane of cow and supermodel alike!

Rural Cityscape

...and I see the catering is sorted.

Brown cow

Sheep

A Country Boy Throws a Turnip at the Squire.

His burro injured, Scotty hauls ass for the nearest town.