Running Joker Gifts

'Looks like she's having a bad hare day.'

'Your shoe's untied.'

Banana Split...

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Joust Sharpener

". . . So that's 4 birdies, 1 eagle, 2 ferrets and a rabbit!"

Get crazy once in a while

'Hole in one!!!!'

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

Jogging Bottoms

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

Bicycle Sidecar.

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

"What did I tell you about practicing on the cat?"

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

Very drunk professional cyclist

Just a little heads up!

'Sorry we don't do black decaf.'

"I can always tell a permanent temp from a temporary temp."

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

Toilet humour

Here lies BoBo the Clown

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."