Royal Entourage Gifts

'We only stay together for the sake of the Holy Roman Empire.'

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

'Now that's an afro!'

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

King George I

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

The Unhappy King

'Sure, real estate prices are sky-high, but kings don't sell their castles, and that's that.'

The Bearskin Hat Family

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

Royal Love

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

'One can see the baby's crown!'

'But, dear -- Lady Godiva is part of my diversity program!'

'Nobody treats the king that way and gets away with it.'

'I'll have your head on a platter.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

"You have a really lousy sense of humor."

"Someone should have warned you - he doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'It's been a pretty slow day -- What say we knock off a couple hours early?'