Romantic Reveler Gifts

Gay celebration.

Theorbo

Joust Sharpener

Cosmonaut

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"This is fun. I'm usually kind of a loner."

You're the olive in my martini

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

Astronaut love

"Well, who's stupid idea was it to honeymoon on Moonlight bay?!"

"Hendrickje, I feel another self-portrait coming on. Bring in the funny hats."

The Loving Couple

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

I’d like to declare my interest. In what? Commitment. Two kids and a dog. Commitment to kids and a dog? And to going for long walks on the beach, to gazing up at the stars, to growing old together … What? I thought you were talking about two kids. That sounds like eight. And why would only tow grow old together? What about the other six? Are you saying they'll grow old at different rates? ... Or are you saying the other six will meet some untimely fate and not grow old at all? Then she asked if

Goldilocks and the three boyfriends.

Frank and Ernie's Relationship Advice. It's not enough to just accept that relationships are two-way streets ... You must also avoid taking side trips down alleys!

Happy Valentine's Day.

'Do you have anything cheap but guaranteed to help me get laid?'

Vitruvian Manatee

Jenga!!!

Mate Mart

Galileo drops ball from Pisa and it goes up.

'You disgust me; but I like it.'

Carbon Dating Agency

'For goodness sake, don't struggle. I think this is quicksand.'

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

"Woulda looked cool with a beer in his hand, though." Michelangelo's cousin, Michelobelo

"They discovered an Earthlike planet, and it's close." "Earthlike?" "Does it have oceans and beaches and sensual ladies who like to gaze at sunsets?" "It may have liquid water. And it's orbiting a red dwarf, so it'll always look like sunset." "But is there anyone there to whisper sweet nothings to?" "I know a guy at NASA. If they send a probe, maybe he could add your dating profile."

"Well, if you must know, he makes me laugh."

'Do you mean I leave a lot to be desired bad, or a lot to be desired good?'

"I can't wait to see what you're like online."

"We think it had something to do with love."

Looks like you put too much dosie in that doe, Earl.

'One second - wo seconds - three seconds - four seconds -one hour...'