Romantic Matchmakers Pillows

"This next arrow should shake things up a bit!"

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

"This sounds promising. . . dark brown hair, loyal, cuddly and good in bed."

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Match maker

Pucker up!

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

"Of all the finger-painting classes in all the day-care centers in all the world, you had to walk into mine."

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

Sidekick speed matching service.

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

Cupid's converge on a bachelor.

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

"The preacher's wife needs a new hobby."

'I don't know what he sees in her - she can't even freeze an embryo.'

"If he were just 8 inches taller, 20 years younger,10 times more mature and a million dollars richer, he'd be perfect."

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'