Fun-loving Matchmaker Pillows

"I'm steelbuns 1995, you must be teen angle 1999."

COMPUTER DATING SERVICE, 'How about a nice fixer-upper?'

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

'Fred, don't you think you're over doing it a bit?'

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"Of all the finger-painting classes in all the day-care centers in all the world, you had to walk into mine."

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

Pucker up!

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

"Okay. So, apart from being a very shy ventriloquist, is there anything else you can tell me about him?"

ACME COMPUTER DATING SERVICE, 'She should be attractive, intelligenty, charming, and funny, or best offer.

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

'Mandy is playing cupid again!'

"I'm sure you will be very happy together."

Witch in bed reading: 'The Joy of Hex'.

"This next arrow should shake things up a bit!"

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

Online Dating

"I now declare a thumb war."

A dog cupid flies an arrow after a dog jumping on a random man's leg.

"You want to see me, Boss?"

"Red with meant, white with fish. . . but it all goes great with chocolate!"

"I think they'll be perfect together. He's a journalist and she's a complete composite."

The Adventures of Morton :This has been my best first date ever...Sooo, what about our plans for the future? YOu know, marriage, kids?...Tell me if I move too fast, okay?

Soulmates.

'Trust me honey, Aunt Iris says he's a Prince!'

'I'm waiting for the right introduction agency to come along.'

'I'd like to meet a girl--', 'Oh, a homophobe, eh?'