Love Matchmaker Pillows

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"It must have been fate that brought us together."

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

'I think Benjamin like me. He linked my homepage to his homepage.'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

Cupid

"I'm all for diversity. Let's get someone in here who knows what they're doing."

'This one writes some fine lyrics, and the other one has composed some beautiful music, but they just done't seem to hit it off as collaborators.'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

Match maker

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Sidekick speed matching service.

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

'Dream-dates don't normally go for nightmares.'

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

Pucker up!

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

"The big challenge now is to get them to mate in captivity."