Matchmaker Magic Pillows

"Well Mom, thanks for setting us up, getting me to the restaurant on time, and getting the conversation started, but I think I can take it from here."

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

Asking out a palm reader.

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

"Men just won't leave me alone!"

The Tennis Racket in the Stone

"I'm all for diversity. Let's get someone in here who knows what they're doing."

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

Match maker

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

Sidekick speed matching service.

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."