Romantic Irony Fan Gifts

Gigolo Diary

End the Winter Blues

'Tomorrow we'll look back on this as a night to remember.'

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

'You keep turning them out and I'll dig a parking garage.'

'I want my lectures to have entertainment value.'

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

"He's Right Behind Me, Isn't He?"

'In a bizarre set of circumstances, the book salesman never showed up, but a drug rep is here with samples of Prozac.'

'Kill all the Canaanites? -- Won't that set a bad precedent?'

"Our guest is Dr. Paul Veblin, renowned marriage counselor and resident of nearby Southport, where he lives with his 6th wife."

Customer tangled up in velvet rope is trying to ring bell for help.

Ingoldsby Legends - Impious Bishop Robert of Birchington

'No! No! No! I don't want to die. . . Then why are you carrying that enormous scythe?'

"Don't take this the wrong way, but the first minute I saw you I wished you the worst."

'No, but you're getting warmer.'

A Cold Snap

'Edna always wore rubber gloves while reading romance novels.'

The outside of a museum with a banner that reads "Nothing by you".

If the British had been the first to see the Grand Canyon.

"It appears to have been done with a key to the city, which narrows the suspects."

Man: 'What the...?!' / 404 ERROR!

"If music be the food of love, shut up."

I like your suit, to me it says 'management'

Executioner hit in stomach bythe head he has just cut off

' . . . but have you had a nice time?'

'Dear Santa, when I asked for a ship, what I meant was...'

'and what do you do?'

"Nah, not my type."

'The tracks are getting fresher. He's close by.'

Congress and the Four Day Week.

'How did you ever get a good conduct medal?'

'Soccer hooligans, majesty! Thousands of them! We're doomed!'

"I told him it wouldn't kill him to try to be nice once in a while, but I was wrong."