Romantic Humor Appreciates Pillows

Boy on father's knee

Sexual chemistry set

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"Honk if you love me!"

Tunnel of Like.

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

"I think it was good for me. Was it good for you?"

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

Tongue in the ear...

'Marry me, and make me the happiest man in the world.' 'You want BOTH?!'

"It's perfect! You're a government redactor, and I'm a broadcast network word bleeper."

"You might want to get that fly off your face."

Dating in 2020

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

'If you really loved me, you'd stay downwind.'

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

Homophone Encounter

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

Frog Prince holds sign: 'Will work for kisses'.

'I hear they wrote their own vows.'

"And from Newton's second law on rigid bodies it can be shown that force equals mass times acceleration...I'll show you."

'Well, I'll be...look at this...there's a song in his heart!'