Romantic Humors Pillows

Young girl asking a boy what he owns before they can be married

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

Sexual chemistry set

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

Tunnel of Like.

"Honk if you love me!"

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

"I think it was good for me. Was it good for you?"

'Marry me, and make me the happiest man in the world.' 'You want BOTH?!'

Boy on father's knee

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

Dating in 2020

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

The stone is semi-precious, so I got you two.

'If you really loved me, you'd stay downwind.'

Homophone Encounter

"It's perfect! You're a government redactor, and I'm a broadcast network word bleeper."

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

Frog Prince holds sign: 'Will work for kisses'.

'You've been faking it, haven't you?'