Romantic Banter Enthusiast Pillows

"Yes, it was good for me - not as good as it was the last time, but probably better than it's going to be the time after this."

"I love you." "I love you less."

"But it wouldn't be premarital sex unless we got married."

'Sweetheart, I love everything about you. Except for your naming you Doug.'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

Bear Costume

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

Say it with flowers: It!

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

" A lot of it is just legal mumbo-jumbo."

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

Romantic Tree Carving

"...and do you agree to accept him as he is, and not try to change him?"

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

'There's more to life than just necking all the time, Frankie!'

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

"It's perfect! You're a government redactor, and I'm a broadcast network word bleeper."

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'

Man and woman

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."