Relationship Banter Enthusiast Pillows

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

"You're hogging the covers again!"

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

'Adam, you left the toilet rock up again!'

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

An Archeologic Dig

'Admit it, you've been laughing behind my back ever since 1957 when we went in that hall of mirrors in Skegness!'

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

Still Lives: 'What's wrong, don't you love me anymore?'

"That fish may be bigger, but I caught more."

"Meanwhile in Dogtown... Put your tongue back in your mouth. And pull up your pants. That’s not what your mom said last night."

"Trust me. It's no big deal. I'm even tuning you out right now."

'His ego needs lipo suction!'

"If I wanted your opinion I would have hauled you in for questioning."

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'

'I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer.'

'I used to think it was her red dress, but I've discovered I find your mother irritating in any color.'

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

The Art of Bantering!

"What's come between us?"

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

"Hey Eric. Do you think they're silicone implants?"

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

"I work from home because I can’t stand the sight of idiots." "Is that why you got rid of all our mirrors?"