Romance Rumor Detective Pillows

"No one else, huh! So who the hell is sending you a pigeon at four in the morning?!"

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"I may be obsessive and I may be compulsive, but no way am I obsessive compulsive."

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"I'm not against going to couples therapy, but it feels weird to do it on a first date."

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"That's no death grimace, Perkins. I think what we're seeing is a 2.8 million-year-old tight smile of spousal event obligation!"

'If you're using this for research into your next book then you can sleep in the spare room!'

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

"There's a rumour going around my head that you don't love me."

"If someone winks a you forty or fifty times, are they coming on to you?"

"It's not what you think."

Got suspicious after he asked to see a recent picture and she sent over an oil painting.

"I want someone whose inner pain is totally hot."

"We're compatible in every way. That's my concern; we have nothing to argue about."

"Now we'll see what my husband has to say about this!"

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

"I can tell when you're just kissing me to get some of my lip balm, Josh."

'You want to understand women?...I granted you a wish, not a miracle!'

'My wife! The therapist we hired to help us reinvigorate our marriage!'

"You weren't playing hard to get! You were scared of commitment!"

'I don't know what they see in her. . . I think I'll take a closer look.'

'We had the perfect marriage until we took the magazine quiz.'

"Hola! Tia Carmen's psychic hotline! Can I tell you where your lousy cheating boyfriend is right now?"

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

'Girls! I won't understand them if I live to be six.'

Trick questions...