Romance Philosopher Gifts

"Love comes and goes, Janet, but this is true co-dependency!"

'When it comes to marriage, I'm a failure - but I'm very good at honeymoons!'

"I never knew what love was until you came along and explained it to me."

Romance is more difficult for robots than it is for people. Sure, we can check for compatibility by comparing operating systems but until battery technology improves, all our relationships will be on-again, off-again. Worst of all, we can't handle passion. When the sparks are flying a romance blowup will follow.

"How can you be sure you really love somebody?"

"Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to acknowledge the fact that no other person will ever be capable of erasing that feeling of utter existential loneliness eating away at us at night when we can't fall asleep."

ACME DATING SERVICE, 'Do you take trade-ins?'

"A guy can fall in love with a smile, then make the mistake of marrying the whole girl."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

'That reminds me of the blind date I had last weekend!'

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

When two philosophers date. So

"The emoji she used says she loves me..."

'He's a catch for any woman - there's so much to re-mould'

"It's always the same: We go eons without seeing each other, I think I'm finally over it, and then...WHAM! I get pulled into her orbit again!"

"Now that was post-modern sex."

"All a cat CAN do is strive for authenticity."

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"Moulting"

Conference on the Control of Time and Space. Left to Right: Isaac Newton, Aristotle, HG Wells, Ptolemy,Isaac Asimov, Albert Einstein, Galileo, Copernicus.

Scurile travels

Is man a social animal? - 'As a married man, the short answer is no.'

"Now look, Frank, Molly, there's nothing wrong with a Polar Bear and a Penguin being in a relationship. In fact, in my experience, Polar opposites attract!"

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

(Diamonds shining, … Dancing, dining, …with some man in a restaurant. Is that all you really want?) (Are you making this up?) (Unsophisticated Lady)