Roller Skating Granny Gifts

'No kidding? I didn't realize 80 is the new 20!'

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"I go that extra mile!"

"One day mommy's slime molds will all be yours!"

"Jones, do you know you are 'just skating by'?"

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"But I wasn't running in the hall."

Rock on Grandma!

'Jack wants to stay home and rad books, and I wanted him to take up roller skating, so we compromised.'

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.

"They can run but they won't be able to hide."

Chicken Coupe.

'Your heart's not in the job - admit you're only doing it for the money!'

Using nano-satellites for extreme roller-skating.

'I did say we were going to give you transport...I didn't say what sort!'

'Now that's what I call fast food.'

'I brought a mobile home.'

Roller skater see a sign: Nightmareville Pop. 5679 Beware Of Government Red Tape

Who said money was not a motivator?

Tortoise & Hare.

The little old lady who lived in a shoe looks into a mobile home.

Dog on skates.

"Phyllis was Roller Derby Queen of 1962, and she'll never let you forget it."

"Give her a little time, Kids. Helen has to get used to now being a grandmother."

Man using roller blades on treadmill.

"I didn't put this in my personal ad, but I'm synonymous with Belgian cuisine."

"The inspector's not getting older. He's getting odder."

"Of course your dad loves the roller-skates you got him. He just went through the door with them."

Baby Boomers will be 100 before they think they're 50.

Tortoise and hair.

'Does your best friend have to come EVERYWHERE with us?'

Extreme Accounting!

'The new incentive scheme seems to be working.'

Breaking the quarantine