Road Tripper Extraordinaire Gifts

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

Scenic Root: ants, bugs and worms using an exposed tree root as a scenic route.

'So much for your new Satnav!'

'Now here's a place I like!'

'Can you see what's causing the hold up?'

Kardiff.

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

Motor Tourism

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Are we broke yet?'

'I think we took a wrong turn between the seventh and eight holes.'

Computer Hitching a Ride to Silicon Valley

Camping.

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

Yes, That Was The Exit

I always play the GPS through the backseat speakers. That's were I'm used to receiving instructions.

Sometimes Y Turn

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"