Ringtones Enthusiast Gifts

Woman covered in bling listening to her mobile's blingtone.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"Interesting cellphone ringer you have. Place it on my desk and step back."

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

Quasimodo's Ringtone.

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

"You'll really like this next song. I wrote it specifically to be a ring tone!"

'Hello, handsome - is that a Billy Cotton ringtone?'

Randi Rhodes

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Stay tuned for a surprising new health study regarding...'

"Stop right there, it's my stockbroker: I have to take this!"

"We may have the same ringtone, Kenneth, but they're in totally different keys."

'No you do a great job. I'm letting you go because I don't like your cell phone ringtone.'

'She always comes to my ringtone. It's the sound of a can opener.'

Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Cleveland. What's YOUR problem?! My deadbeat brother-in-law won't leave. What do I do? For six months, he's been sleeping on my couch, watching my tv, and drinking my Dr. Pepper. Excellent question. It reminds me of the time Stalin liberated Eastern Europe and then didn't leave for 44 years. You're going to need a massive arms race, a containment strategy, and Sylvester Stallone. Now he's using my toothbrush.

"What singing? That's my ringtone."

"This tone means the battery is low. This one means you've just driven over a pedestrian. And this one indicates that someone sitting near you in a coffee shop is about to grab your phone and stuff it down your throat!"

'I just love this new ring tone.'

'Michelle, this is your brother, Paul, do you copy? Over...Paul to Michelle, do you read me?...'

"This new phone is totally cool. The only thing it needs a ringer that plays a song more annoying than anyone else."

Doctor to mom about kid: 'Hey - 104.5? Your kid's temperature happens to be my favorite radio station!'

'A sure-win radio talk show. People phone in with questions on existence and reality, and you respond with total silence.'

The reception here is awful!