Reward System Strategist Pillows

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

"Carrots just didn't get me going anymore, so I switched to chocolate instead..."

'We can't cut entitlements for federal employees. We're federal employees.'

'He's working on the great American requirements document.'

'I brought in a big order and my boss gave me a feather for my cap.'

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

Dangling Carrots

Monkey casino study.

"This is as far as your air miles take you."

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

How corporate data wizards decide it's time to re-vamp everything...

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

"What do you get for the man who complains about everything?"

"We're still negotiating. I want a six-figure starting salary and they don't want to hire me."

"I always choose immediate gratification over vague rewards at some unspecified time in the future."

'... and last, but not least, a big Christmas bonus for Daddy to make sure I get what I want.'

The Evolution of the Bonus

'The object is to make money, not pay claims! Don't make me tell you again!'

"Next time, before buying expensive gifts, be sure there's enough money left to rent your own camels."

'I'm not writing 'gifts optional' on your birthday party invitation again this year 'cause no one got you a gift.'

Giftbags in Heaven and Hell.

"Do I get the reward if I hand myself in..?"

"You said you wanted something really rewarding for your last wish so I made you a teacher."

"Six ideas for $10 or $15 for a dozen."

'The new automated system was a bit of a disaster!'

"Complete the Nelson deal without delay or complication and this peanut is yours."

"When I think of the things I used to do for stickers, I feel like such an idiot."

National Insurance Employers Contributions

Loyalty Card