Retro Western Film Buff T-Shirts

'It's that builder you accused of being a cowboy. He said he'll be waiting for you outside at high noon.'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Billy. The Kid.

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

Nun Fight.

"Shootout at the Soapy Canal"

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

The Comfiest Hombre in the West

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

'OK, let's see who's going to be the pack horse today: Heads or tails?'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"You funnin' me, bub?"

Crossing the Nachos Grande

"Head for the carrousel! It's our only chance!"

Historic Bank Jobs.

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

Draw!

"Uh-oh it's happening aain, the feeling I'm being triggered...."

'And what makes you think this is hostile terrain, Hank?'

'Mama! Aliens.'

How witness protection really works...

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

Old West Bounty Hunter.

The embarrassment of mistaking a salon for a saloon.

"I can't talk louder, I'm a little horse."

"Yep, first the gold run out, then the microchip manufacturing went overseas."