Retro Technology Fan Gifts

Early Treadmills,

'The campfire's down and I can't send any messages. Call IT.'

'Mr. Wigglerum finally paid his bill but he did it by faxing us cash.'

A man jumps on a pile of papers in the Data Comprestion Unit.

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

'I'm looking for the Betamax department?'

"I've had a tip off that someone on the team has been using email."

'This is the interoffice phone system they installed over the weekend?'

Then/Now: Antennas vs. Satellite Dishes.

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

"I want custody of the kid. He's the only one who knows how to operate the VCR"

"Yes, I keep a landline. Getting up 50 times a day to answer telemarketers keeps me in shape."

"Honey, do you want hunter, gatherer or both on your pizza?"

"Ever since that new, lighter club came out, I'm stuck with this heavy club that I can't even give away."

"You're a latitude-and-longitude person, which will be helpful to you, I'm sure, in 1992."

"Do you want to come in and see Grandma's landline?"

'The key to inner peace? A land line.'

"This is a CLASSIC pre-owned special. See, it has a cigarette lighter instead of a USB socket."

"'Round these parts, you'd be plum crazy not to use a reliable search injun."

Man in office listening to portable radio.

Joe Bob Edison, standing next to his greatest invention.

The first recorded e-mail message was launched in the Gobi Desert by Kikitake Suji

Man with candle in thought bubble, "Ideas before Edison"

A lost caveman civilization meets the modern world.

'A.A. Aardvark: Look me up in the phone book, I should be on the first page...'

'When I was young I wanted to be a poet, but we couldn't afford a typewriter.'

'Dang. I think my computer needs another update.'

I'm near the airport.

Connecting to the Cloud.

"I'll take that one."

"Would you like to purchase a videotape of your transaction?"

"I'm here, honey... in the media room."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Another Turning Point in the Industrial Revolution. Ford Motor Co. On second thought, let's put the cars on the conveyor belt.

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''