Vintage Technology Fan Gifts

'Do you want to hear my new ring tone?'

'We now pause for technical difficulties....'

"He says, 'What hath god wrought...' What should I write back?"

"It's not outdated - it's retro."

For the War Inventions Board. The Blow-bomb for Extinguishing the Fuses of Zeppelin Bombs.

R.J. Dolan's funniest answering machine messages next to his grave.

'Why use a computer when twenty girls like her can do the same amount of work?'

Mobile phones overtake landlines.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Best before 65 million BC.

Time Machine Collision

Another Turning Point in the Industrial Revolution. Ford Motor Co. On second thought, let's put the cars on the conveyor belt.

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

Drive in movies.

"Dammit all, haven't they heard of e-mail?"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

'..It's just that with all your amazing powers of deduction and elimination, Holmes, I'm just a little surprised that the best solution you can come up with for seeing off the hound of the Baskervilles, is to 'chase them across the moors with a hoover. up

Adult Barbershop

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

"Can't fix the WiFi? How times flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

"I've had a tip off that someone on the team has been using email."

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

Really Early Vikings

"It appears you have a virus."

Man with candle in thought bubble, "Ideas before Edison"

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

'I think you'll find this just as much fun as 'Grand Theft Auto IV''

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

Pinochio's Computer

"You're actually passing notes in class? That is so retro!"

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

'Confusion some years before the invention of the axle.'

'And of course if you'e feeling patriotic today, we have here a new line of PCs produced by the federal government.'