Retro Sitcom Buff Gifts

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

How witness protection really works...

"Ben, forget... what... I'd said about... plastics!"

'...tonights main feature is silent and in black and white.'

'Thanks for buying the ventriloquism instructional tapes. You are now listening to tape number one...'

"They don't call them reruns anymore...they call them deja-views."

Celebrity endorsements? I thought you said celibate endorsements. No wonder we're coming in under budget.

Brighton Rocky

A potato's favourite video

"This now concludes our broadcast day."

Lorne Greene

'Morcambe and Wise.'

Pamela Anderson Ward.

'Funny, it usually works OK after you've given it a hefty kick.'

"When was this license issued?"

'We now pause for technical difficulties....'

Warning! This classic 70's comedy contains humour.

"Hey man, the pilots are sick. Do you think you can fly this?" "No problemo, Bart dude." "Otto Pilot"

"Do you suppose I could enjoy 'Dynasty' without listening to an hour of suspender-snapping?"

'You'll have to give up wine and women. You can sing, but only Julie Andrews numbers.'

"Are you the gent who complained about cold soup?"

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all,'

Martha Stewart's punishment - "Well, if you ask me, it might have been worse. The court could have sentenced me to watch all my old television programs."

"Can Greg come out and play ball with the Feds?"

'It took us a long time, but we finally made it -- take us to Mork and Mindy.'

'Hello Cynthia, it's me...I thought I'd phone for a natter, Gerald's fallen asleep in front of the TV...trying to program the video.'

'Yes, the test shows that you don't actually have a heart. But you can get one from the good doctor in the north.'

"One, one Milky Way! Two, two Milky Ways! Three, three Milky Ways! Four Milky Ways! Ah ah ah!!!!!"

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Shooting - No. VII

"It's a good thing no one ever found out about this."

'Truly, truly, good and stretched.'

'I can fix the fuzziness and the vertical hold, but I can't do anything about Chris Matthews.'

'Disgusting! It's a blow-by-blow description of an episode of Terry and June.'

'I bet we're the only house in the street with a 3D telly!'