Retro Music Enthusiast Gifts

'Fancy coming back to my room to have a look at my collection of 78's ?'

'I've checked the patient's records and he likes Buddy Holly and James Last.'

'Who's Phil Collins?'

"This is an old, upper-middle-class white spiritual."

"Ahhh, look at all the lonely people."

Ernie's Music. Ernie, you're opening a music store? Yep, I'm going to serve a niche market. I won't be selling CD's or any other digital music. I also won't be selling the old cassette or eight-track tapes. I'm only selling records. I'm catering to audiophiles who appreciate the unique sound quality they deliver. That's great! Are you going to adverties? Yeah, my tagline is "All sales vinyl"

You're listening to K-OLD the golden oldies station. Back in a few … Oldies? You listen to oldies? Of course. Sinatra! Neil Diamond! Metallica. Vanilla Ice. The world is dead to me. Neil who?

Don't feel bad, Mort. It happens to all of us, eventually, the songs we grew up with become oldies. Sigh. Granted, the songs you grew up with aren't even oldies anymore … they're just gone. Like ragtime, and medieval lutes. Stop. I guess you'd call them deadies. STOP.

A swing bin...

Michael Jackson

"We have to remember that our senior citizens were children of the 60's and 70's."

'Next time your friends ask, son, just tell them I'm an Elvis impersonator. No need to add, 'The Older and Fatter Years'.'

"Have you seen my CD player?"

"Seventy-five tapes! After three years and spending just about all the allowance I've ever earned...I've got the perfect music collection! My 8-track tapes will be around forever!"

Disco Owls

Camel Boom Box

Diner.

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

The Missing Sock Returns

"And this is our media room."

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

Early Colour TV

Instructions for Bow Tie Wearers

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

'From albums to 8-tracks to cassettes to CD's...What a long, loud trip it's been!'

Fun (circa 1955)

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

Liam Gallagher.

Computer Class.

'I know I complimented you on that outfit last time you wore it, but that was in 1980.'

'It's an antique!'

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

“I have to warn you - my parents are a bit old-fashioned.”