Retro Machines Gifts

Boombox

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

Fossil record player.

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

"This car is a retro classic. Instead of a USB outlet there's a cigarette lighter."

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

'Music & Gym'

The anti-social network: 'Hey Jeffrey...I need help setting up my dad's anti-social network.'

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

'Sure, I remember using carbon paper. Does that carbon date me?'

"Please mum - not the baby photos."

'In case of computer bug break glass.'

"Oh, come on, you know we should have switched to touch-tone years ago."

'How kids really saw Mr Robinson in computer classes.'

Obsolete: Any piece of machinery that you bought last week for $100,000.

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

Young Geeks.

"I love you, even though you still use a flip phone."

'This is a painting of your grandfather.'

Idiot's Guide to Programming a VCR.

'Apparently the poor love's walkman is broken.'

"Your steak's prepared in the firebox of a 17th century tank engine - unfortunately sir, the chef can't confirm if it has 0-60T wheel arrangement or not."

"I think you're using the old remote dear...."

"What about that! His brain still uses the old vacuum tubes."

An old-fashioned printer using an Albion press.

'Can I carry your computer disks to school?'

"Now it's high definition!"

"Remember always power up you machine clockwise"

Have you seen this toaster?

'Walkman' 'Shuffle man'

'Funny, it usually works OK after you've given it a hefty kick.'

'The key to inner peace? A land line.'