Retirement Renegades Gifts

"I've crunched the numbers in your retirement account. It's time to figure out who will be wearing the mask and who will be driving the getaway car."

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Queen of Upcycling!

Today, a special retro segment of The Fad Herald. It's the Fad Herald. Off the hook! Hey jive turkeys, here's what's not cool: Fossil fuels, dependence on Mideast oil, long gas lines. Here's what's groovy: Solar power, alternative fuels, energy independence. Can you dig? The world is changing, baby! Instead of solar panels, I'm buying a sweet 8-track player. Next week, a look ahead to 2040. What's out: Waiting in long lines to fill up the spacecraft with gas.

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

Old man fighting against time with an arm wrestle.

Now entering: Space. Population - wouldn't you like to know.

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'Why can't I park it here? I'm just getting my moneys worth.'

'Judge Bush agreed to come out of retirement on a temporary basis.'

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

'Lager Lout'- 'Saga Lout'

Beard, socks and sandals.

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

"You gotta love the mpg we're getting!"

Mary Quant.

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."

"I'm old enough to remember when people thought retirement had something to do with not having a job. Don't laugh! We used to believe all sorts of ridiculous stuff!"

"Declared Victory Garden"

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

"I rolled over my 401K into the football pool."

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

'No need to put my details in darlin'... You're the girl for me!'

'I'm sixty-five. I'm retiring from being a house wife!'

"He retired at an executive, returned as a contractor, became a consultant and now he's a brooding presence."

Looks like his business confidence is picking up.

Unusual Retirement Plans

Old man with straw in gin.