Retirement Rebel Gifts

Unusual Retirement Plans

'I know you just retired, but I want you to stop following me!'

"I rolled over my 401K into the football pool."

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

'Lager Lout'- 'Saga Lout'

Old man with straw in gin.

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Beard, socks and sandals.

Semi-retired man returns to work, amends sign to 'Not quite dun roamin''.

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'Mrs Gridlington doesn't like being referred to as 'duck' or 'dearie'...so I just call her 'the old trout'!'

Old man fighting against time with an arm wrestle.

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."

"I'm old enough to remember when people thought retirement had something to do with not having a job. Don't laugh! We used to believe all sorts of ridiculous stuff!"

'When he retired, I thought we would have long walks daily, but he's busier than ever...'

'I'm sixty-five. I'm retiring from being a house wife!'

"Opting out of annuities is going to be a disaster for some people..."

'Instead of hunting tonight, how about ordering a pizza and eating the delivery man when he comes?'

'Judge Bush agreed to come out of retirement on a temporary basis.'

'Ferguson's not like the rest of us, he's AROUND the hill.'

'I REALLY disapprove of our mandatory retirement plan!'

"She just said 'To hell with this put-out-to-pasture bulls**t. I'm hittin' the open road!!'"

"As a tribute to your outstanding career, we're retiring your assigned parking space."

"So you're telling me you prefer this to a retirement home?"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

Too old to rock'n'roll now, Sir?

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

'So that's agreed, we terrify people with stories about living to a hundred in poverty and hope that makes them drop dead early.'

'I really don't care about your work/life balance.'

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

'It's odd...when I was CEO of Phoenix Industries everybody laughed at my jokes, but since I've been retired, nobody does.'

Hipster Police Department