Resolution Ripper Gifts

"Oh...it's you again."

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

Mediation Process

Great doing business with you. I look forward to next year.

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

January Joiner

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

'Attention everyone! I'd like to make a rebuttal of the resolution my husband just made about my going SHOPPING.'

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

'You haven't seem my New Years Resolutions have you?...The one where I'm committing to 2,5000 billable hours and pulling in 6 major clients.'

Their first New Year's solution was easy to fulfill: turning the foodchain.

Good intentions last a month on average

New years resolutions

"Do you have a one day a year membership?"

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

"Your New Years resolution was to give up the grog!"

"Sure-fire weight loss program."

"Ah, but that wasn't a campaign promise - It was a NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION!"

"How much does it cost to buy a membership then never use it?"

New Year's Resolution.

'Honestly you could drive a 'coach and horses' through this document, there's no definition of 'weight loss', no time frame, no sanctions.'

Happy New Year!

Holidays are Here, Think!