Reptile Collector Gifts

'Oooo! Oooo! There it goes again! That unbearable itch inside my shell!'

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Football Chameleon

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

Giant reptiles use building as a pinata.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

"Did you just do a rooster?"

Crocodile

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

Reptile Class: 'My homework ate my dog.'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

Snake Eyes

'Ms. Moffit, please inform the staff that I have morphed and send in that plump young marketing trainee.'

Danth battle?

Ed totally blows the final portion of his Chameleon Aptitude test.

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

'I'm very proud of my El Gecko.'

'I keep thinking I'm David Icke...'

While at the Zoo, Victoria gets an idea.

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

"First save Mister chomp-chomp!"

'Now, you've been naughty, you're in time out! I'll turn you over in five minutes!'

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

"Your profile didn't mention you being a chewer."

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

'Ah, beauty in the eye of the beholder!'

"You've got a friend in me."

'Hi Mom He followed me home, Can I keep him'

He only had enough money for one, and for the life of him he couldn't remember the difference,