Animal Collectors Gifts

"Sorry, Noah, these are all mid-sized. You'll have to eat the leftovers."

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

"Did you just do a rooster?"

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"Calm down! That was a massive fart, NOT a sneeze!"

Mummy?!

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

'Researching the opossum article.'

"When you said you wanted to bring a pet to work, I thought you meant a DOG!"

'All of your previous employers said you are very loyal.'

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"It's lost all meaning in the steroid era."

"Remember - you have sharp teeth and claws, but he has sarcasm."

'Not another copycat accident?!?! That bloody nursery rhyme's got a lot to answer for.'

Free Range Cows.

"You're spoiling that dog again!"

Middle Age: When the four letter word you use most is 'What?'

"Did you know that cats aren't mentioned anywhere in the Bible?"

"No, I'm only interested in dogs and cats."

'Stampede!!'

'Then, one day a kid yelled, 'Man, look at that ugly duck with the long neck and the black mole over it's beak.'. To think I spent years parading around thinking I was a swan.'

Gardener pulling a tree through a dog park with a dog marking his territory.

"Hold on - 1...2...3...?"

World of Cow: Horn Gel

"She's a weiner cat."

'Our accident in Wyoming wiped out our vacations for the next 5 years.'