Repair Renegade Pillows

'What's this, your estimate or your telephone number?'

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

Home maintenance

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

'Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?'

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

Jack of all trades

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. II

Man reading magazine: 'International Procrastinator.'

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

Garage "Now then, squire, what would you like first - the bad news, or the really, really bad news?"

Garage Mechanic.

"OK, let's see. For starters, the guarantee only covers the muffler."

"Baldo, you've been at that all day! I thought you said you can fix this thing 15 minutes!"

Working in recovery of Hurricane

Do it yourself

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

Queen of Upcycling!

That's supposed to say garage sale!

Aladdin's Less Magic Carpet Ride.

A holiday at home

Tractor Racing

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

Paint/Paint Remover, Glue/Glue Remover...

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

"I'll never understand wallpaper."

'Apart from his awful workmanship, my hubby's handy work is fine.'

Organized chaos.

"You gave me the wrong drink. I demand a total refund!!" "OK. Where's the drink?" "What do you mean? I drank it. It wasn't till I was done that I realized it was the wrong drink. The right drink leaves a different aftertaste." "You can't finish the drink and then ask for a refund. That's not how it works." "You didn't tell me that before I paid for the wrong drink. So that's on you." "That's not how it works!"

"You've opened my eyes to the most disgusting worldly delights."

'We could either give you a $50,000 home improvement loan, or $2,000 to just blow your house up.'

'The carpet's too thick so I cut a bit off the door.'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. VI

"Yeah, these things smell disgusting, but if you line your nest with them, you get insulation and it helps to keep the eggs warm..."