Rehab Renegade Pillows

'I think my work here is done.'

Jack of all trades

Hiding the electronics.

Queen of Upcycling!

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

A holiday at home

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

Paint/Paint Remover, Glue/Glue Remover...

'Apart from his awful workmanship, my hubby's handy work is fine.'

"I'll never understand wallpaper."

Organized chaos.

Home maintenance

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

'The carpet's too thick so I cut a bit off the door.'

'My whole family made New Year's resolutions. Dad's eating more fruit, Mom's eating more vegetables, and I'm eating more cake.'

'We could either give you a $50,000 home improvement loan, or $2,000 to just blow your house up.'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. VI

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

"OK, let's see. For starters, the guarantee only covers the muffler."

"If it please Your Honor, may I redo the bench?"

Working in recovery of Hurricane

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

"Can you send me a detailed list of knee exercises I could do at home but won't because I have no discipline."

"Seriously, this can't be the only stretch you know."

"And they'll remain in captivity until they are fully rehabilitated and able to fly again."

"I'll give you 3 to 1 nobody else turns up."

Exams