Religious Canvasser Gifts

"It's those bloody Jehovah's Witness kids again! Knocking and not running away!"

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

St. Elmo's fired.

R.C.I.A.

The joy of sects.

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

"Hallelujah!"

Got god? (no you don't...He's got you!)

Honk if you're holy.

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

"T.G.I.F."

"Can you put some sunscreen on my ankles."

"For goodness sake brother. Haven't you finished that note to the milkman yet?"

'Have your daily bread every other day.'

Christ and His Disciples - Ticket for the London Hospital.

The first attempt at stoning St. Stephen...

At home with the Pope.

'More options!'

"Perhaps we should accept her invitation to church. Then ask the priest questions during the sermon."

Growing Churches

"Do you have a minute to talk about God?"

'It's unto thee.'

Christian Speed Dating

Man sees line of priests entering Mass Transit Authority.

"Son, God is invisible...That's how we know we are made in His Image."

Selling to the devil.

The British Society of Campanology...

John Bunyan and Alfred Deakin

"OMG, a right wing, ultra conservative, radical religious nut."

'Hello, Madame, we'd like to talk to you about cod...'

The world welcomes Pope Francis I

"Don't even think of going over my head Brother James!"

"Is 'oblivious' the same as' undecided'?"

"Of course I believe in tithing, I'm just easing into it."

Copyright 1340 B.C. God (Moses)