Religion And Humor Gifts

Football or no football, that's not how we pass the plate.

Vicar In Spectacles

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"Well, that certainly killed my buzz."

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

"Does the ark have wifi?"

United Church of OMG

'Please take your receipt!'

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

Pre-nuptual Nativity

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

Three Parent Baby

'So long as he doesn't preach what he practices.'

"And in the beginning Mary begat a little lamb"

'When I asked for your favourite Saint, I didn't think of someone like Michael Ballack, son.'

"This is a beta test, right?"

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

Nativity - The sitcom

'He may be the Messiah, but he's no Springsteen.'

Monkey's Ejected from the Garden of Eden

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

"This wandering in the desert for forty years thing -- It IS allegorical, isn't it?"

And the Lord said: 'I created the universe. What on earth makes you think I'll be impressed by a dead goat?'

"Thanks Moses, but I prefer my water bottled."

Churchwarden Talking to Rector

'Now that they've got a new Pope, there aren't any openings for old guys.'

"OK, OK, Dad. I'm up... I'm up."

'Thou shalt not covet a parking space.'

'I know it's all the rage with jazz musicians and pop singers, Twiddlecock - but choristers?'