Relic Hunter Gifts

Archaeologists look at stratigraphy with irons in it - 'And right above the Stone Age strata you can clearly see artefacts from the 'Iron Age'!'

"These things are useless. They beep constantly, but we never find a thing."

"Walter, will you please step away from that sign?"

"And this relic was left here by Saint Winifred the Forgetful."

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

'Not MORE flippin' crockery!'

'You and your stones collection.'

Toltec, ha! You wouldn't know Toltec if it bit you!'

"You're right, professor, this wouldn't be just any birthday!"

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

The Dubloon Stops Here

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

Hey, I think I found something. Heavy metal detector.

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

Pirate

"Did you check the little patch of grass by the swing set?"

An old man wearing a band t-shirt

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

"Awwwk! Mutiny is a go! Pass it on! Awwk!"

"But the real treasure is spending time with friends."

Archaeologists discover a football