Relationship Talker Pillows

"You said it. I heard it. There's no taking it back, Harold!"

You were warned about mixed marriages.

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.

"Sophia, will you agree to form a joint exploratory committee for marriage?"

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

WHO checklist

"So, how are we doing with our trust issues?"

'He's a catch for any woman - there's so much to re-mould'

"Honey, this is serious, we need to text."

'It WAS rather unkind of you to hide his bottle-opener, Mrs Jones.'

'He's got 99 problems but his Bitch aint one!'

"He thinks he never makes mistakes."

Debbie greatly misinterpreted the marriage counselor's suggestion that she and Tom have a monthly 'date night.'

"You used to be that ambitious."

"I'll agree to a pre-nup if you'll agree to a non-compete clause."

Mime marriage.

Relationship Issues.

"I'll bet there's a story there."

"Marriage is driving me crazy and she's my designated driver!"

"We don't talk."

'He's never there for me.'

'Do you take this annoying woman to be your lawful wedded wife?'

"Why do I feel like your mother is going to blame this on my cleaning?"

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

'Margaret. I feel that we must talk about our relationship.'

'I think both of you are always too busy: You don't talk anymore...'

"Uh-oh. The so-called marriage penalty."

Tunnel of love, then disillusionment, then mundane humdrum coexistence.

"I suggest you read this book....it comes highly recommended by earthlings."

'I'm sorry but I need my own space.'

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

"If I'd known, I would've changed my vows to; Until bald and fat do we part."

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

"Oh come now, Mr And Mrs narcissus, Have you two been fighting again?"