Relationship Debater Pillows

"He said he's with another woman, but I know that he's at the golf club again."

"My friend!" "My husband!" "My God!"

'My wife was psychic and divorced me over an affair I hadn't had yet.'

I can have any woman I please - trouble is, these days they're almost impossible to please.

'Darling-I thought that now we're engaged....'

"Well if these walls could talk, I'm pretty sure they'd agree with me."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

Dialogue

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

"Now that's a win."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

"On the contrary, Bosworth, it's YOU who has lost all perspective."

The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

Like Minded

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

And now, for a rebuttal.

"It's a legal document authorizing you to carry out a Do Not Resuscitate order on my behalf, although heaven knows, you have a hard enough time cancelling a magazine subscription."

"If you were the only man in the world, and I were the only woman. . . would we still have to diet?"

The last word.

Global warming debate.

Meaningful...Meaningless relationships.

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

'My opponent hates cats.'