Relationship Communicator Pillows

"Both of you are still poles apart."

In the Guru District

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

'Progress of a bookshelf'

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"You've changed."

Relationship Warning Lights

"We'll always have couples therapy."

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"Any questions?"

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

Couples' therapy

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

"You've reached Randy the love doctor. What ails you?"

"Will you listen to the same three anecdotes until one of you dies?"

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

'Great Therapy!'

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'I'd like to dedicate this next tune to those who have discovered love, gotten married, and wished desperately for death.'

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"I traded his corncob pipe and his button nose for a buttoned lip, and things couldn't be better."

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

"We hope seeing a marriage counselor maybe could make one of us less stubborn!"