Regulation Wizard Gifts

"I'm hoping Brexit is going to simplify things for us."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

US v.s. Tech Giants

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

'Dad 'If Jack brought 10,000 shares at $3 and he sold 75% of them to Larry for $8 before the value went down to $2, what did Jack end up with?''

Cartoon about having many investors for crowd funding.

"What are you doing? It's Halloween. Not leaving your deliveries to the last minute this year?"

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

"Please, James...will you stop worrying whether the baby will meet all government regulations!"

"Don't worry! He's totally changed..."

Traffic Management Strategic Group

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

Obama's Financial Reform Pill: I hope they won't need a glass of water.

He waited for the next wave of regulations to arrive.

Haven't Rented a Game in 2 Weeks.

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

"...And this is Mable, who will assist me with the billing."

'Which one of these things is the soap?'

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

'You may have three mergers.'

'J.B., there's not enough ROI on the IPO, YTD.'

'How long do we have to get in compliance?'

Money Tree