Reclusive Reader T-Shirts

Thomas Pynchon's Evil Twin

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

Letters escape from a caged book.

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

'It's baseball season!'

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

'My daughter says I'm hopelessly outdated...'

"Just the slippers is fine!"

Trivia/Great Literature.

'What's the point of a bookmakers if there's nowhere left that sells books?'

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

"Boy, these are really overdue!"

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

Zack Brillard and Live-In Companion

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

'In my opinion the series should have stopped after the first 3 books.'

"Delivery."

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

Hell's Schlegel

What's that, Lance? It's called a newspaper. It's like a Kindle, but instead of your fingers leaving smudges, they get smudged.

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

You read the instruction manual for a video game for your book report?

'Assume your positions - let's bring these Humans TO THEIR KNEES!'

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

Castaway reading a magazine from a bottle

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

"I see by your copy of 'Newsweek' that Lyndon Johnson has decided not to run for reelection."

"We no longer shelve gay fiction separately. It's been assimilated."