Reclusive Reader Gifts

Thomas Pynchon's Evil Twin

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Letters escape from a caged book.

'It's baseball season!'

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

'My daughter says I'm hopelessly outdated...'

Trivia/Great Literature.

"Just the slippers is fine!"

'What's the point of a bookmakers if there's nowhere left that sells books?'

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

"Boy, these are really overdue!"

'In my opinion the series should have stopped after the first 3 books.'

"Delivery."

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

Zack Brillard and Live-In Companion

Hell's Schlegel

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

You read the instruction manual for a video game for your book report?

'Assume your positions - let's bring these Humans TO THEIR KNEES!'

Castaway reading a magazine from a bottle

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

"We no longer shelve gay fiction separately. It's been assimilated."

"I have a low-cost project you can which you can involve yourself with."