Receiving Bad News Gifts

"We find pizza softens the blow of bad news."

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

Fear of news.

"Let me put it this way: I'm hitting 'Unlike' and 'Unhire.'"

"It's over!"

'Hey! Have you heard the awful news?!'

'It just hasn't been my day.'

Desert - Steep Hill sign.

'Breaking news. . . I've just found out my wife has left me.'

'Phew! What a day I've had. Still, I don't suppose it can get any worse.'

'Stocks rose on news that random acts of kindness today outnumbered random acts of violence.'

'How did you do with those stocks I recommended?'

So much to be cross about, so little time.

'Joe gives 'em the bad news, and I give 'em the good news, just like 'good cop - bad cop'!'

"It's the right drink in the right place at the right time."

"Poor Zachary. A meteorite squashed his swing set."

Man walking in the desert things that he has found salvation only to be informed that he is screwed.

Man Reading From Within Bullet-Proof Box

'What do you want to hear first, the bad news or the even worse news?'

"The most beautiful words in the English language: not "I love you", but "It's benign"."

"Can't a guy have a bad day in private!?"

Happy Man with Phone

'Tonight's news is so bad, we're just going to do half an hour of happy talk instead....'

"It's okay to have a bad day."

"What's the weather today?"

'Ptui. I spit.'

'You can only believe half of what you read on a cave wall.'

Not your day.