Receipt Collector Pillows

"Can I have a receipt?"

Who Will Be The Iron Accountant?

Point of order.

'We decided to give you cash for your birthday, so please give me a receipt.'

'Please make out the receipt to 'workers' protective clothing'.'

"For a small fee I can give you a shorter receipt."

'What do you mean 'can I include receipts with all the gifts for easy return?' '

"I take it from his demeanour that Sir would be requiring some cashback."

Two Christmas Stockings - One for Presents, One for Receipts

I believe a lot of accountants use it.

"Hear ye...the reading of the cvs receipt."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Maybe clean out your wallet

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

I wouldn't mind so much, but it's all junk mail.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'I got and 'E' in spelling.' - 'That is an 'F'.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Hottest Tix in TownSpecial Mets promotion dates

Teddy Bears Picnic - Tickets on sale here.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

The birth of junk mail.

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

Seinfeld: The Early Years.

'Just tell him you mind your teacher and do your lessons. You don't have to prove it.'