Receipt Collector Gifts

"Can I have a receipt?"

Who Will Be The Iron Accountant?

Point of order.

'We decided to give you cash for your birthday, so please give me a receipt.'

'Please make out the receipt to 'workers' protective clothing'.'

"For a small fee I can give you a shorter receipt."

'What do you mean 'can I include receipts with all the gifts for easy return?' '

"I take it from his demeanour that Sir would be requiring some cashback."

Two Christmas Stockings - One for Presents, One for Receipts

I believe a lot of accountants use it.

"Hear ye...the reading of the cvs receipt."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

I wouldn't mind so much, but it's all junk mail.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'I got and 'E' in spelling.' - 'That is an 'F'.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

The birth of junk mail.

Hottest Tix in TownSpecial Mets promotion dates

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

Teddy Bears Picnic - Tickets on sale here.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

'Just tell him you mind your teacher and do your lessons. You don't have to prove it.'

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"